Jaycee: Escape Impossible After Girls Were Born

More details from Jaycee Dugard's just-released grand jury testimony: "I was very scared," she says of when she arrived at the Antioch house where Phillip and Nancy Garrido held her for 18 years. "I didn't know who he was. I didn't know why he was doing this. I just wanted to go home." The 123 pages of Dugard's testimony that were unsealed delve deeply into the mind of a child rapist who thought he was doing no wrong, reports the LA Times. More excerpts:

• On the rapes: He raped her at least once a week for the first three years, until her first child was born.
• On the birth of that child: "Things really changed. He said that he was eventually going to stop having sex with me and that, you, know, he's just really trying to change and he wants us all to be a family."
• On gifts: She was given "Barbie stuff" on her first birthday after being taken, and a cat after she complained she was lonely. But the cat was then taken from her, as it dirtied the small space she was living in.
• On Garrido's sense of 'family:' "Phillip wanted us to be a family. He was our dad, and Nancy was their mom. You know, that's what we did … to give the kids, you know, normal as possible" a life.
• On why she stayed: "I wanted him to teach me how to drive and stuff. And that never came. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't leave. I had the girls. I didn't know where to go, what I would do for money or anything. I didn't have anything."
• Her final message to Garrido: "Everything you have ever done to me has been wrong, and someday I hope you can see that. Thankfully I am doing well now and no longer live in a nightmare. I have wonderful friends and family around me. Something you can never take from me again. You do not matter anymore."

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