Google Renames Itself Topeka

Google was so moved when Topeka, Kansas, changed its name to Google, that as of today, the company has changed its name to Topeka. “We didn’t reach this decision lightly,” writes Eric Schmidt on the official Topeka blog. “We had a fair amount of brand equity tied up in our old name.” But they felt a lot of kinship with the city, and decided to press forward despite the consequences. Consequences like these:

• All the product names change too, so get used to Topeka News, Topeka Maps and Tmail. Virgle, Google’s outerspace joint venture with Virgin, will now be called Vireka.
• Google employees, formerly called “Googlers” will now have to be called “Topekers” or maybe “Topekans”—the board’s meeting to sort it out.
• Oliver Google Kai’s parents might want to consider switching his name, too.
• You can't Google things anymore, you have to Topeka them.
• Google, Kansas may have to change its name again if it wants to continue sucking up.
• Some people will inevitably believe this is real rather than an April Fools joke.

(More Topeka Kansas Google stories.)