Dems Forcing 'Girly' Lightbulbs on Us: Colbert

Thanks to the 2007 Energy Independence and Security Act, incandescent lightbulbs will be "effectively banned" by the Democrats come 2012, complained Stephen Colbert last night—and he is not happy about their replacements, the girly-looking compact fluorescent lights that some conservatives have described as looking like pigtails or curlicues. “Pigtail lights! You know who has pigtails? Girls,” Colbert railed. “I want a boy lightbulb. One that’s shaped like a giant glowing testicle.”

“And the socket-huggers will say, ‘These pigtail bulbs will lower your energy bills and last up to 10 years,’” he continued, “but have they even considered what that will do to the American joke-telling industry? ‘How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?’ I don’t know, it’s only been seven years, we don’t have to change it yet.” (More The Colbert Report stories.)