This month's entry in the annals of truly stupid criminals: Police in Arizona say they found a would-be thief thanks to the suspect's own severed finger, the Arizona Republic reports. Joshua Allen Goverman, 29, allegedly tried to steal copper wiring (value: $300) from an air conditioning truck Oct. 7 but apparently lost his finger in the process. He then, for some reason, left the finger behind. In the morning, the victim went to his truck and "got quite a surprise," a police news release says. "A cut-off finger that was caught up in the wiring."
The grossest quote we've heard in a while, from a Glendale cop: "They took a Popsicle stick and were able to attach it to that finger, and they were able to roll that finger and get a print on that finger." That led them to Goverman, who was indeed missing a finger. This being 2013, they also reviewed his Facebook account, and found an image the criminal genius had posted prior to his arrest "of his hand with the missing portion of his finger." He gave detectives the same story he'd posted on Facebook: that the finger was severed while he was fixing a car. But he apparently 'fessed up after police actually showed him the finger and ended up getting booked on theft charges. "I can't believe he didn't come back and get the finger," the truck's driver marvels to KPHO. "I would've come back and got the finger." (More dumb criminals stories.)