This Lady Says She Can See Into Your Future, Via Cheese

Jennifer Billock tells fortunes using the art of tyromancy
By Jenn Gidman,  Newser Staff
Posted Sep 16, 2023 8:30 AM CDT
This Lady Says She Can See Into Your Future, Via Cheese
We spy a rousing game of "Pac-Man" in your future.   (Getty Images/Tim UR)

How accurately can that provolone in your fridge predict the future? How good of a soothsayer is that wheel of Stilton? You may not have the answers to those questions, but Jennifer Billock thinks she does. That's because the Chicago native is a self-proclaimed expert in tyromancy, described by Occultopedia as the centuries-old "art and practice of divining the past, the present, and the future by interpreting omens found in cheese." "Every piece of cheese has something it can tell you about the cheese itself, and also about you," the 40-year-old dairy diviner tells Reuters. Billock tells FOX 32 Chicago that she first learned about this unique form of prognostication at the start of the pandemic, "when I was Googling 'weird ways to tell the future.'"

Billock explains that she can't use just any old type of cheese to ply her craft, noting, "You want something that has holes or veins or ash or even ... a moldy piece" to best deliver a prophesy. Flat Gruyere, for instance, wouldn't be a great medium. The ideal choices? Blue cheese and Swiss, according to Billock. She says she prefers clients bring their own cheese to her readings, because it's a cheese they may already "feel a connection to," but if that's not possible, Billock is more than happy to tap into her own stash. No one's a bigger fan of her particular way of fortune-telling than Billock herself. "I really enjoy it, I love cheese," she tells Reuters. "It's great, because you get your fortune told and then you get to eat it!" She does tell FOX 32 that she doesn't get many follow-up calls, however, so she's not sure how accurate her predictions are. Watch her in action here. (More strange stuff stories.)

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